5.22.17
where i live now has
deep valleys and mountains
that rise like muscles on every horizon,
and the grass changes color with the seasons,
green in the colder months,
golden in the summer.
where i live now smells
of horse shit and vague sewage and fire
and chamomile flowers and eucalyptus,
and all around me roam wild beasts
that seem just as confused as I am about human life,
and there are unholy insects, there are
frogs, ducks, dragonflies,
and the occasional scorpion.
where i live now feels like a city
where nobody else lives because
the houses are all overgrown
and spaced out and not conducive
to fostering human relationships.
where i live now is wild earth
not even a mile from the freeway.
where i live now is where they used to film
old western movies.
where i live now sustains itself
on the constant thrum of centuries old
sycamore and oak trees t
hat were around when the Indians lived here,
but are lonely now,
so lonely, nothing to do but throw patches of shade
on places where no human or animal ever lies.
i once saw a family of deer while jogging near the place
where i live now.
it was the closest thing to beautiful i’ll ever witness.
sometimes i love
where i live now.
but most days i miss who we were
when we lived in that other place,
that is nothing like the place
where i live now,
and deserves its own poem for description.
Written at 12:37 at night, in my office, in Agoura Hills CA, while chewing on my sweater’s drawstring…and I just sneezed.