10.19.17

don’t begin to do it
unless there is something
in you you wish to unlock.
don’t begin to do it
until you are prepared to lose
all you have not yet worked
to gain. until before you
lies misery like a hot pie
and you find it delectable
and dig in.

don’t do it if you
obsesses over what to obsesses over.

don’t do it.

don’t begin to do it if you
fear dark places and foul breath
and strangers.

don’t do it if your
virginity is precious and your future
necessary.

don’t begin to do it
unless you look fifty years ahead
and recognize the terror of
communal living, if while you’re alive
you already miss the bliss of isolation.
don’t begin to do it. there is nothing
more heavy than a mind the morning
after, carrying in its canals and trenches
the residue of errors made in clarity.
don’t begin to do it if mistakes are things
you avoid and hunger you detest and
cold temperatures to you are unendurable.
don’t begin to do it.

but if you do begin
know you will not stop.
it will devour you with its tremendous
and viscous teeth. it will tear you to shreds. and
through the pain you will imagine something
greater. you will hear the voice of the wind
in your ear telling you that you were enough.
you were always enough. that you achieved
feats greater than your imagination could hold.
you began though you were warned not to.
and out the other side you came
a legend in your own right
crucified by your sublime potential.
you are enough.
you are more than enough.
you are all there ever was or will be.
if you do it.

Written at 11:14 at night, in my office, in Agoura Hills CA. After completing a bang-bang. A German bar for the Raider’s game, and then an uppity sushi joint that instructed you not to eat your fish with soy sauce. I dipped those mother fuckers in regardless.